About two weeks ago I had the misfortune to develop at UTI that turned into a kidney infection. So, even though I tend to avoid all medical professionals like the eyes of a professor asking who would like to start the discussion on the reading assignment, I had to buck up and deal with it. In the end I guess excruciating pain and a high fever trumps my dislike of doctors.
Now, of course, my doctor knows I’m trans. It’s not something we discuss much, I visit a separate clinic for my hormones and such, but it’s there in my paperwork and from time to time she asks me how that’s all going. I mean after all, if anyone should have the details of my body it should probably be the person checking up on that body.
And while everyone in the office is super respectful, sometimes they trip up. From time to time they double check which pronouns I’m using and how I’d like them to refer to me which is always wonderful. I’d always rather have people ask then use the wrong thing and me either have to cringe or correct them. Still, I can tell the nurses feel weird when the have to ask me “female body” questions. They don’t want to offend or upset me, but they also don’t know a way around the conversation. It matters that they care and for me that’s enough.
However, this time since I had to actually be hospitalized, I had to deal with more than just my personal doctors.
It started in the ER with admissions. The lady helping me fill out my paperwork was all sorts of confused. My old name was still in their system. And when my doctor sent me to the ER somewhere in the paperwork she sent, it referred to me as a “female bodied person.” So this poor lady looked at my name, my paperwork, my ID and insurance card, and then asked, “So…you’re a…man?”
This was the look she gave me while asking.
If I hadn’t been feeling so crappy, I may have laughed. Instead I told her I was transgender. Which seemed to confuse her even more. She just replied, “Oh…Okay…I’m gonna just put you down as male.” And I figured I’d just tell my nurse/doctor once I was admitted that I was trans so they would be on the same page.
Now everyone in the ER was amazing to me, led me to the men’s room when I had to give a urine sample, addressed me as “Sir,” and all that. It was very annoying to have to take off my binder, but the gown was baggy enough and I was in enough discomfort that I didn’t really care so much.
Fast forward to the most hilarious part of the entire evening. Once I was admitted, the nurse and aid were coming in and out of my room setting me up and making sure I was all set with everything from pain meds and IV fluids to a toothbrush. At one point the aid came in and attached this item to the corner of my bed.
I had two friends in my room making sure I was set for the night before they left. One of them was enjoying this even more than I was. As the aid left he said to me, “So, when are you gonna tell them you won’t be using that?” And we both died. It wouldn’t have been so hilarious if it wasn’t for the fact that it took the poor aid about 3 minutes to get it to attach to the bed in the first place.
I will say it was awesome to pass as male so well that it was assumed I would be able to use that (even though if I was cis, I would still rather walk the 10 steps to the actual bathroom.) And it was a high note of a really crappy day.
The rest of my stay was pretty uneventful as far as my trans-ness. One of my nurses did ask a few questions about my transition, but only after we had developed a bit of a rapport and she asked if it was okay to discuss the subject. Even then, she was just curious how long I had been out and if I had enough support.
So all and all I’d vote it a good experience. At some point I’ll have to write up something about how an amazing experience looks and gush about how wonderfully accepting the Mazzoni Clinic in Philadelphia is in dealing with people under the trans umbrella.
And both me and my kidneys are doing well now to anyone concerned.
After 3 days at the hospital I was very happy to leave and be feeling better
Thursdays with T 